I was listening to the radio one day to a child psychologist who said that
parents should treat their children with respect as they would treat their
best friend - with courtesy, dignity, and diplomacy. I've never treated my
children any other way, I told myself. But later that night, I got to
thinking about it.
Suppose our good friends, Fred and Eleanor, came over and I treated them
as I sometimes do my children? Dinner might go like this:
'Well, it's about time you two got here! What have you been doing,
dawdling? Shut the door, Fred; were you born in a barn?'
'Well, Eleanor, how have you been? I've been meaning to have you folks over
for ages'
'Fred, take it easy on the dip, or it will ruin your dinner.'
'Have you heard from any of the old gang lately? I got a card from the
Martins just the other day. They're in Fort Lauderdale again.'
'What's the matter, Fred? You're fidgeting! . . . It's down the hall, the
first door on the left, and I don't want to see a towel in the middle of
the floor when you're finished, either!'
'How are the children doing?'
'Well, if everybody's hungry, why don't we go in to dinner? You all wash
up, and I'll dish up the food. Don't tell me your hands are clean, Eleanor.
I saw you playing with the dog.'
'Fred, you sit there, and Eleanor, you sit with the half glass of milk. You
know you're all elbows when it comes to milk.'
'Fred, I don't see any cauliflower on your plate. You don't like
cauliflower? Have you tried it like I fix it? Well, you try a spoonful. If
you don't like it I won't make you finish it, but if you don't try it,
forget the dessert!'
'Now, what were we talking about? Oh yes, the Gruebers. They sold their
house. I understand they took quite a loss on it.'
'Eleanor, don't talk with food in your mouth; and use your napkin!'
"At that moment in my fantasy, my son walked into the room. 'How nice of
you to come,' I said pleasantly.
'Now what did I do?' he sighed."
Respect. It is a powerful component in mercy.
-- Source: Call to Joy, By Don Jacobsen,
Copyright (c) 2001, ISBN 0828016240
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