For a good part of my life I suffered from a disease. This disease
dampened my spirits, drained me of my energy, and robbed me of
my vitality. Sometimes it even made it hard to get out of bed in
the morning. It made every part of my life more difficult and
demanding. For a while too it looked like this disease would be
a weight I would have to carry for the rest of my life. This
disease was called, "And then I’ll be happy."
I think I first caught it in middle school. During my younger
years I seemed to always enjoy the moment and relish each
day of my life. At some point during those middle school years,
however, I remember starting to look to the future more and
more and enjoying today less and less. At first I thought getting
into high school and being a teenager would make me happy. Then
the dream switched to being the high school football star. That
was followed by being on my own in college. Next came having a
great career and high paying job. Getting rich and having that
big house followed it. After that was the dream of raising a
family. Then there was retiring and finally enjoying my life.
Each dream postponed my happiness a little further down the
road. Finally I realized that if I kept going this way, I would
be dead before I was happy.
That is when I came to see that it would be a lot better to be
happy now than to live with this disease. Life I knew would
always have fresh problems and frustrations, but I thought
it would be a lot better to meet them with a happy heart and
loving soul rather than waiting for life to be perfect.
These days I am in remission. I still have occasional flare ups
of "And then I'll be happy," but I heal them by knowing that
I can choose love and joy every second of my life.
God loves us all so much and wants us to be happy today,
tomorrow, and forever. Let’s not let Him down. Let’s choose
love, share joy, and spread happiness with every moment we have.
-- Joseph J Mazzella